


The Aftermath

by RiverTalesien



Series: On the Edge of Forever [1]
Category: The 100 (TV), clexa - Fandom
Genre: F/F, No one is going to read this, Revenge, Soulmates, They ALL Deserve Happiness, alternate season 3, and make it part of a series of them, but i like this kind of reversal, but we can write dark things once in a while, do not copy or repost anywhere without permission, if you like pain this might be for you, pain and angst, short fic, thank god it is short, there is no comfort here at all, what-if fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:46:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22443535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiverTalesien/pseuds/RiverTalesien
Summary: Based on an anon prompt for "how long were you standing there?"This is set in an alternate season 3.After Lexa's betrayal at Mt. Weather, Clarke was focused solely on revenge.She had no idea what it would take from her.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Series: On the Edge of Forever [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1615417
Comments: 28
Kudos: 46





	The Aftermath

“How long have you been standing there?”

The mourning was over. It hadn’t been what Clarke thought it would be; something out of an old film she once saw on the Ark: crowds of people in dark suits, tears and an open casket, the loved, lost one beautifully presented. 

There was no casket. 

There was no crowd. 

Lexa’s body had been lost, like so many others, in the bombed-out tower, as she struggled to save as many as she could. 

The war was over, but it remained inside the survivors, like shrapnel never found, slowly leaking its poison. 

Clarke felt as if her insides were being liquefied, melting away into nothing and soon, she would dissolve with them, just a tear left on a windowpane. She wasn’t going to live through this, she was sure of it. 

She couldn’t speak; it would just be a scream. 

She couldn’t eat. There was no way it would stay down. 

There was no sleep, no comfort as her heart and head ached and longed for what was missing and would never be found again. 

And knowing none of it had to happen, if she hadn’t ordered the attack, if she hadn’t organized such a perfect revenge. 

_“Polis will change how you think of us.”_

What could have been more precise, more cutting than a direct attack on the heart of her ragged empire? 

What was sanity worth now, what in life was worth surviving for now? 

They hadn’t deserved it. 

In Mount Weather, there had been no choice, but Polis…that _was_ her choice.

^^^

Months of planning and preparing, a steel-minded focus that denied any other option, fed by the anger and resentment of her people and her need for something, anything, to draw her out of the horrors of Mount Weather.

Her choice.

She’d arranged to meet Lexa, acting as an ambassador for the Sky People. She would come alone, they would meet and all eyes would be upon her as she offered her allegiance, offered their technology and skills. 

As they were all distracted. 

Raven’s creations were perfect, not one went off before they were ready. 

But no plan is that perfect. 

She hadn’t expected Lexa, on her knees, offering the only apology she could, her own life if it would make up for anything, handing her the knife, and for a moment, Clarke had been tempted. No one else needed to die. Lexa would not fight her. She made the offering herself. Blood would have blood. 

And she wanted to. Through her tears and from her broken heart, she wanted to. How easy then to stab that blade through her cold, black heart and be done with it. 

Before all her people, Lexa bowed. Gave up her life. 

Wanheda would lead them now. The Commander of the Blood was no more. 

A room full of Grounders followed, on their knees and she could have walked away, triumphant, no more bloodshed, no more war. It was over, simple as that. 

But that was not part of the plan and there was no way to warn Bellamy. Not this time.

Like Cinderella fleeing the ball, she ran. Taking the crumbling stairs three at a time, with the would-be-prince of Lexa chasing after her in the confusion. It should have been so easy.

They were caught up as they reached the empty courtyard and Clarke felt all the panic in the world envelope her. She had to reach Bellamy. Had to stop this. 

But Lexa.

Strong, fast, certain Lexa. 

She’d crumbled in her arms, incoherent, desperate. 

And for one moment the world fell away and all she could see was through the depth of green eyes, how love could survive anything. 

She touched those warm lips with the tips of her fingers, blurry through her tears. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Clarke. What have you done?” 

The explosions were perfectly timed to go off in a cascade across the city until they reached the tower. 

Screams and shouting, children and horses fleeing in the haze of smoke as the first bricks fell from above and Lexa knew. 

She felt warm fingers against her cheek and warm breath against her ear. 

“May we meet again.”

^^^

“Clarke, we have to leave. Now.” 

The clothes had been a gift. She and Octavia wore them now as disguise, as the survivors mourned their Commander and all those lost. The remains of the army balanced along the outskirts of the city, waiting for the Ice Nation’s inevitable response, watching for a sign of the evil Sky People they were now aligned with. 

Watching the funeral fires burn from the safety of the old shelter, Clarke could not move. The dark, red smoke was all that was left of her heart and it might burn forever, carried on the wind. All she wanted was to go to it, be carried away with it. 

Octavia’s hand on her arm could not have been colder, could not have been more different from her. 

“If they find us, we’re dead.” 

Octavia had no idea, wouldn’t have cared if she did. She couldn’t know that she touched a corpse, a husk with no heart that would die a thousand times over in fire after fire if it would bring Lexa back, if it would bring them all back. 

The Grounders had no leader. The Flame was gone. 

The Ice Nation was descending.

^^^

Clarke had dreamt of the ground: a paradise of green and gold and brown and blue. A world of before: before there were people and wars. Before the world was scorched and black.

She’d lived as the dream changed to a world of two, where they no longer owed anything to their people. 

“Clarke, we have to leave. Now.”

^^^

On the crumbling tiles of the shelter, where Jaha and Kane had first met the Commander, she found a leaf. 

As Octavia brought the horses, Clarke bent to pick it up, twirling it lightly in her fingers. 

She tucked it carefully into the breast of her jacket as she emerged into the night, the reins of a horse white as snow held out for her. 

The last of Lexa's gifts, lonely and bright at the end of the dark, at the end of everything.

**Author's Note:**

> I was asked for a drabble and this happened. Let me know if you like. Hmu on Tumblr @rivertalesien. 
> 
> This is the first in what will be a series of 1k word one-shots revolving through various alternate realities, inspired by the Star Trek episode "City on the Edge of Forever." Other influences include World on a Wire and Dark City. Tags will be updated for each story. 
> 
> Thanks for reading.


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